The Guardian
by moonlightandmagnolias85
Summary: When Bella gives birth to her first child with Jacob Black, Edward finds it too hard to stay away. No matter what, he always comes back. AU.
1. Chapter 1

**Note: I'm slightly mortified that the first thing I'm posting is a Twilight fic. I wrote this several years ago and never finished, though, and thought it would be a good way get back into the groove of writing. It is very AU and completely ignores "Breaking Dawn."_  
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**Prologue**

He knew that it was a dangerous and stupid thing to do. If he was discovered, it would hurt Bella inconceivably, Jacob would be beyond furious, and it would only make his own still heart ache with longing. There was also the off chance that he would have a murderous pack of werewolves after him for breaking the treaty, but he wasn't quite as worried about that last part.

He couldn't resist once Seth told him, though. (The rest of the Cullens still found it hilarious that he kept in touch with a _werewolf_ of all things, but Seth was a good kid.)

Edward knew if he had a heart, it would have stopped beating at the moment the words left Seth's mouth. He should have expected it, of course. She had _married _him and it was what married couples did after a few years – started families.

He still hadn't been prepared for the sight of her, though; swollen ankles and breasts, and her heavily pregnant stomach. She was more beautiful than he remembered and he wished with every fiber of his being that it was _his_ child she was carrying. _Their_ child.

The baby, however, would have a head full of black hair like her real father, chocolate brown eyes, and a dusky complexion fitting of her Quileute ancestors. But best of all and most important to Edward, Bella's child would have a beating heart and be wonderfully human.

She was born on Christmas Eve. Edward watched Jacob shuffle Bella out of the house and into the car to go to the hospital at four o'clock in the morning, looking frantic and beyond excited, and Edward couldn't help the jealous rage that rose in his stomach.

_ You chose this_, he kept repeating to himself. _She would be with you right now if you just could have turned her_…

He spent the day near Charlie's house, waiting for news. When he finally pulled into the driveway at 8:00 that night, Edward heard what he needed to hear. _Ellie, 7 pounds 8 ounces, 21 inches long, born at 5:17 pm. She has Bella's nose._

That night, Edward hunted with a ferocity he had been missing for ten years, ever since she walked out of his life for good. For some reason, the thought of that baby, the daughter of not only the woman he loved, but his sworn enemy, completely floored him. He couldn't make himself leave if he wanted to.

They came home from the hospital two days later, Ellie wearing a fuzzy red Christmas hat, bundled in layers of blankets and sleeping peacefully in her mother's arms. He only got a brief glimpse of her as the garage door closed, but it was enough to keep him waiting in the snow for hours.

Later that evening, after eating a simple, belated Christmas dinner and fawning over their new grandchild, Charlie, Billy, Renee, and Phil all left the little family alone to celebrate privately. Edward crouched behind a tree as their headlights swept by, then crept carefully closer to the living room window. Even though he knew Jacob stopped phasing a few years before, there was still a chance his senses were more acute than a normal human's. It was a risk being here, but one he was willing to take.

Edward could see that Jacob was sufficiently distracted, however, with Bella wrapped in his arms. They were watching Ellie sleep, gently rocking back and forth in her swing. He still couldn't see the baby, since her swing faced away from him and he felt a surge of frustration. He would just have to wait a little longer.

An hour later, Bella and Jacob finally rose, and Jacob carefully picked up his daughter. He carried her to the nursery and gently placed her into the crib, tucking the blankets securely around her still sleeping form.

"Is she supposed to sleep this much? I thought newborns were supposed to cry or something," he muttered quietly to Bella.

Edward could almost feel Bella's grin.

"Well, maybe we got lucky. You never know."

Edward listened to them mumble their goodnights to Ellie and grew anxious when the light from the nursery finally extinguished. _Just a few more minutes…_

He listened for another hour, but apparently, the new parents were exhausted. As far as he could tell, they were both already in a deep sleep. It was safe now.

In less than a second, Edward was standing in the middle of the dark nursery. The walls were a pale yellow, as bright as the sunshine that rarely appeared in Forks.

Edward slowly took a deep breath before silently padding up to the crib, steeling himself. As he leaned over the edge and gazed down at Ellie, _Bella's daughter, _he felt his breath catch in his throat.

What a remarkable little creature. She looked just like her father, unfortunately, but Charlie was right – that was Bella's nose. Before he could stop himself, Edward reached down and lightly touched her little cheek, a smile gracing his features, even though he felt like his heart was breaking.

As he traced the gentle curve of Ellie's lips, her eyes suddenly popped open. Edward immediately drew his hand back, ready to bolt and leave no evidence of his presence if she started to cry, but she simply looked at him.

Her eyes were beautiful, neither the color of Jacob's nor Bella's exactly, though he knew that could very well change.

"Hello, little one," he whispered, and before he knew what he was doing, he had reached down and scooped her up into his arms. She was swaddled so tightly she wouldn't immediately be cold.

It was the first time he had ever held a baby, but it felt natural. Right. Though she was a million times more fragile than her mother had been at seventeen, Edward was not afraid of hurting her. He would never hurt her. He loved her as he would his own.

He closed his eyes and leaned down, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.

"I love your mother more than anything," he sighed, then inhaled her sweet baby scent.

Edward froze.

He knew that smell. _Oh._

She smelled like her mother, or at least she would someday. It was so slight at the moment he almost couldn't catch it, but it was there. It filled him with a longing so desperate and deep he wanted to cry heart wrenching painful sobs.

Instead they simply stared at each other, Edward and Ellie, Ellie and Edward, and he suddenly knew down to the very core of his being that he would die for her, just like he would her mother. He would protect her until the day she left this earth, no matter what, because she was _Bella's_. And then he would protect her children, and their children, and their children's children after.

If he couldn't have Bella, if he couldn't have a real life, he could do everything in his power to protect her family. Even though it was a sad excuse for happiness, it would bring him peace.

Edward kissed Ellie once more, then carefully laid her back in the crib as he'd found her. She immediately started to cry, and Edward heard both Jacob and Bella stirring right away. He left as quickly as he'd come, but he turned around at the edge of the trees and looked back to the nursery just in time to see the light flicker on and Bella lift Ellie out of the crib.

Bella kissed her head and began murmuring comfortingly as she brought Ellie to her shoulder, but almost immediately, she stopped. Edward saw her slowly turn, her brow furrowed, and look around the room curiously. Then she slowly leaned in and sniffed Ellie.

Edward heard her gasp at the realization, as she smelled his enticing, sweet smell all over her child. She knew he'd been there. He didn't wait to see how she would react, however, and instead began running at full speed toward Seattle. It didn't matter how she felt about it.

He had already made up his mind to come back someday.

**Chapter One: Blue Violets**

The night after Christmas, the first night her baby was home from the hospital, was the first time Bella had smelled his scent in ten years. It was the strangest, most surreal moment of her life, mostly because his smell was emanating from her _daughter. _At first she'd been irrationally scared, though she wasn't sure why, but that feeling turned quickly to a bittersweet contentment.

As she'd fed Ellie for only the third time at home, then rocked her back to sleep in the comfortable rocking chair which was a gift from her father, Bella calmed down from the shock of knowing Edward was near for the first time in so long and reflected on her emotions. She had always seemed to feel things much deeper than other people. That particular character trait was revealed in every decision she had ever made, but until she met Edward when she was seventeen, she never knew she could feel _so much._

Bella still loved Edward as much as she did on the day she realized he would never, ever willingly turn her into a vampire, and she still loved her husband as much as she did on the day she married him. She loved two men, almost exactly the same amount, but in completely different ways. Now she loved Jake in a new way, as well – as the father of her child.

That romantic love for both Edward and Jacob, however, almost paled in comparison to what she felt at the moment for the sleeping baby in her arms. This was a kind of love she had never experienced before, had never even really contemplated.

It was violent, primal, and achingly beautiful. She now understood the fierce protectiveness that most mothers so often exhibited and knew that if Ellie's life was ever in danger, she would do anything to defend her. She would not hesitate to lie, cheat, steal, or kill if it meant making Ellie happy and safe.

The thought that Edward had touched Ellie, probably very gently and lovingly, brought a lump to her throat. Though Ellie was Jacob's daughter and she would not change that fact for anything, it was hard not to imagine what could have happened if Edward was, well, not a vampire. If he was just a normal man, Ellie would have been his.

Wouldn't she?

It was a thought Bella contemplated many times over the years. Did she love Edward like she did _because_ he was a vampire? Would she have loved him just as fiercely if he was human? She would never know the answer, though deep in her heart she felt it was a _no_, she would not love him like she did if he wasn't a vampire. It was simple really – his entire identity was wrapped up in what he was, and if he wasn't an immortal, he wouldn't be the same man. It had taken her a long time to come to that realization.

When Edward refused to change her so many years ago, she was furious. No matter how much she fought, screamed, cried, and pleaded, he stayed firm. With a wry smile, he had told her that one day she would understand and thank him. For the longest time, even after she married Jake, she didn't believe him. Though she loved her husband passionately, she couldn't stop thinking about what her life would have been like had she made Edward eventually give in.

Now, though, she finally understood. If he had bitten her, if he had turned her, she never would have had _this._ She never would have been a mother and experienced all of the incredible feelings, hopes, and dreams that her child brought into Bella's world.

In one day she suddenly understood everything Rosalie had tried to tell her so long ago, and understood that no matter how much she and Edward loved each other, _being human was so much more significant than forever._

All she could think at the moment on her baby's third night in the world was _thank you thank you thank you thank you._

The next morning, Bella woke to an empty bed and for a moment felt completely disoriented. A few seconds later, the smell of frying bacon brought her back to her senses and she grinned, falling back against the pillows. _Oh Jake…_

Bella soon forced herself out of bed and padded silently to the combined kitchen and family room. She once again found Ellie in her swing, this time facing the television, where a rousing episode of _Sesame Street _was playing.

Bella snorted. "_Sesame Street_, Jake? She's barely forty-eight hours old."

Jake whirled around from the stove, a spatula in his hand, and grinned widely.

"Yeah, well, it's never too early to start learning your ABC's, right? And that Cookie Monster's a pretty cool guy." He turned back around to tend to the bacon and eggs he was frying and said over his shoulder, "I knew the smell of bacon would get you up."

Bella leaned down and tugged Ellie's hat snugly around her ears, then went to the kitchen and began getting plates and utensils out of the cabinets. She was already contemplating whether or not to voice her suspicions on Edward's whereabouts when Jake said very quietly, the laughter absent from his voice, "He was here last night, wasn't he?"

Bella jumped and immediately dropped the plate she was holding.

Considering that almost all of their dinnerware was made out of heavy plastic due to Bella's clumsiness, it didn't break, but the effect was the same.

She was silent, not sure whether to deny his claim or agree.

Jacob's voice once again broke through her thoughts. "I could smell him all over Ellie's room this morning, Bells. Did he speak to you?"

Bella could tell Jake was trying very hard to control his voice, all the while still pushing the eggs around the skillet like it was no big deal and they discussed Edward every day.

Finally, she swallowed and found her voice. "He didn't speak to me. I didn't even see him. I…" she paused and sighed, walking over to Jake and leaning against the counter next to him. "I smelled him last night when I fed Ellie."

Jake began shoveling the eggs into a bowl with a little too much ferocity. Bella could see the veins in his neck beginning to stand out, and though she knew he hadn't phased in a couple of years, she began to worry what would happen if he lost control around Ellie.

"Jake, you need to get a hold of yourself. Don't _ever _lose your temper with Ellie around. _Ever_," Bella spoke calmly, but very firmly.

As soon as the words were out of her mouth, Jake froze and shook his head. He took a step back from the stove and motioned to the food, mumbling, "Will you take care of that?"

Before Bella knew it, he was out the front door and walking quickly towards the trees at the edge of the yard. Bella sighed, but for some reason, she was still eerily calm. She didn't really believe he would let himself phase again. He had grown up too much to let himself be ruled by his emotions. Herself, on the other hand, she wasn't too sure about.

After a few minutes, Bella methodically piled the eggs and bacon onto two plates and set them on the table, then walked over to the swing and unbuckled Ellie from the contraption. Honestly, for never having even held a baby before in her life, this felt strangely natural. All she had to do was look at Ellie and everything felt right with the world, Edward or no Edward.

Bella brought Ellie into the kitchen and settled the baby in her new bouncer on the chair next to her.

"Don't worry, daddy will be right back," she cooed, smoothing the ridiculous amount of jet black hair on the newborn's head. "We're not going to worry about him, are we?"

"No, you're not." Jacob slipped back into the room as quickly as he'd left, looking completely back to normal. "Sorry," he mumbled.

Bella smiled, trying to prove to him how unaffected she was by Edward's unexpected manifestation.

"It's okay. Come and eat your breakfast. Ellie's getting impatient," she teased.

Jacob settled into the chair next to her and eyed her suspiciously.

"You know, Bella, you're strangely calm about this. I feel like I'm missing something." Jake began shoveling eggs into his mouth at a rapid speed, his appetite still strong even though the wolf hadn't made an appearance in quite a while. "I can't exactly put a sign in the yard that says 'NO VAMPIRES ALLOWED,'" Jake said dramatically.

Bella sighed and pushed the food around her plate. After a while, she said quietly, "I don't think you'll need to…I mean, I've been thinking about it, and…"

She struggled to find the right words, unsure whether or not she could convey the depth of her feelings and gratitude to Edward at the moment without making Jake misunderstand. She knew part of him expected her to fall to pieces all over again at the thought of her first love as she had so many times in the past; after all, Edward's presence was something they never expected to deal with again, but suddenly, it was a reality. Bella knew it would be difficult for Jacob to comprehend just how unfazed she was by the whole ordeal. It was so very unlike her.

"I think he came here, Jake, just to…prove a point to me. Sort of as a final goodbye?" Bella attempted.

"I don't get it." Jacob frowned and shook his head.

Bella reached over and began to gently bounce Ellie, then sighed and tried again.

"When he wouldn't…change me, you know I was furious. He said that one day I would thank him and understand. Jake, I've understood for _years_ now that things happened exactly the way they should have because I can't imagine my life without you." Bella leaned over and quickly kissed Jake's lips, then sat back down and started again. "But Jacob, I can't even describe..." she gestured to Ellie, "how _she _makes me feel."

Jacob lowered his fork and chewed thoughtfully. Bella let him contemplate her words for a few moments before continuing.

"It's like she's put everything into perspective. Now that she's here, it's like I can't remember what the world was like without her. I don't want to. I think he just wanted to see her, kind of like an 'I told you so,' you know?" Bella looked at Jacob eagerly, hoping her words were sufficient. "He knows I'm happy and I think he just wanted to let me know he's happy for me. For us."

Jacob sat silently for a minute, but still continued to eat. Nothing ever came between him and his food, no matter what emotions he was feeling, Bella mused; it was a fact which she always found humorous.

"So you're not, you know, freaking out over this? You're not going to…run off after him and leave me?" Jacob said the last part jokingly, but Bella knew it was definitely not a laughing matter. It tore her apart to think he still had those kinds of doubts about her love for him.

Bella rose and wrapped her arms around him from behind, leaning her chin lightly against his shoulder.

"No, I'm not freaking out over this. I know it's not like me, because I've _always_ freaked out about him, but for some reason it's just different now." Bella smiled and kissed Jake's ear, then whispered quietly, "And I will never, ever leave you. Please don't waste your time worrying about things like that."

She felt Jacob relax, and then before she knew it he turned around and pulled her into his lap. He grinned at her before softly kissing her forehead, nose, and finally her lips.

"Okay," he said simply.

Bella laughed, happy that he believed her so easily and trusted her so much. She started to lean in for another kiss, but abruptly stopped as Ellie began to fuss. Jake raised his eyebrows and looked towards the baby.

"I guess we better get used to that, hm?" Bella stood and picked Ellie up, noticing that she definitely had a full diaper. She grinned as she adjusted Ellie on her shoulder. "Oh daddy…I think it's time for someone's first poopy diaper change…"

Jacob wrinkled his nose, but rose obediently and followed Bella down the hall and into the nursery. As Bella laid Ellie out on the changing table and began to unsnap her little onesie, Jacob mumbled, "I think I'd rather smell baby poop than that God-awful leech smell."

Bella turned and glared at Jake for moment, then sighed and said quietly, "You won't have to smell it much longer. I _really _don't think he'll be coming back."

Three months later found Ellie a happy, thriving baby, and frankly, Bella wasn't sure what she had ever done to deserve having such an easy to please infant. Bella learned quickly what Ellie's different cries meant, whether she was hungry, tired, not feeling well, or needed a diaper change, and unless one of those things was happening, she rarely fussed. She even slept through the night more often than not, usually at least seven hours, and also took a nap in the afternoon. Renee constantly told Bella how lucky she was, but warned her than an easy baby meant Ellie might very well be a terrible toddler.

That stage seemed very far off at the moment, though, so Bella simply enjoyed every day. Ellie knew the sound of her voice, as well as Jacob's, and smiled every time she saw either one of them. Jacob was wonderful at getting her to giggle and coo, and he found delight in every new thing she learned. The fact that Ellie could now hold her head up had Jake constantly moving around the room, causing her to twist and turn and follow him with her gaze. Bella humored him when he swore their baby was a genius because _surely_ no other child was that smart or agile at only three months old.

Though Bella knew Ellie would definitely grow tired of one particular tradition Bella had instigated only her third night home from the hospital, she had already made up her mind to do it until Ellie forced her stop. Every night before bedtime, Bella laid Ellie in her crib or bouncy seat, opened a book, and read out loud to her. At the moment, she was using this time as an excuse to re-read her favorite classics, like _Wuthering Heights_ and _Pride and Prejudice_, but she was already collecting more popular children's books like _The Chronicles of Narnia, Harry Potter,_ and_ Charlotte's Web_ that she looked forward to sharing with Ellie for the first time. She was determined that her child would have a love of reading and figured the best way to guarantee it was to never slack on these sessions, though half the time, Ellie was asleep before Bella finished a chapter.

One particular Friday night, Bella found herself completely alone with the baby for the first time since she was born. Jacob, only after much prodding, poking, and assurances from Bella that she would be fine, had gone camping with Quil and Embry and would be gone until Sunday night. So far, everything had gone smoothly – no broken dishes or burnt food and only one episode of crying from Ellie after Bella hadn't gotten her bottle ready fast enough.

Both girls went to bed early and Ellie woke up only once at two o'clock in the morning wanting a bottle. When Bella put her back down forty five minutes later, there was absolutely nothing amiss in Ellie's room.

Bella didn't wake again until seven when she heard Ellie start to fuss from her crib. The bed felt too lonely without Jacob's gigantic body there anyway, so there was absolutely no reason to want to stay snuggled under the covers. Bella yawned as she crawled out of bed and made her way to the nursery.

"Good morning, Ellie-bear," Bella called cheerfully as she pushed open the door and walked over to the crib. "How's my baby this morn…" Bella trailed off and simply stared at the sight that greeted her.

It wasn't gruesome, scary, or even funny, just very puzzling.

Lying next to Ellie in the crib was a beautiful, very fresh bouquet of blue violets.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two: Memories to Life**

Bella didn't know what to think. She was convinced that Edward had said his final goodbye, that he wasn't going to try and contact her anymore and that he wouldn't be a part of her daughter's life; however, there was tangible evidence, once again, that he had snuck into her daughter's room for the second time. Who's to say he hadn't done it more than that, as well? It was frustrating beyond belief knowing no matter what she did, she couldn't keep him out.

Honestly, what was he playing at? Bella didn't get it, and instead of feeling touched by his simple gesture like she was last time, she was beyond irritated – fuming mad, really.

She stalked around the house all morning with Ellie in her arms, crying up a storm. The baby seemed to pick up on her mother's feelings, but try as she might, Bella couldn't control herself. Angry tears streamed down her face for hours, and only after she passed by a mirror in the hallway and caught a glimpse of her crazed mien out of the corner of her eye did Bella pull herself together. It wasn't fair to Ellie to act so selfish.

Finally, after another hour, both Bella and Ellie seemed to be back to a functioning, if not completely normal, state of mind. Ellie was asleep in her swing, and Bella sat staring at the now slightly withered little bouquet of violets that she had carefully laid on the kitchen table. Her mind, for some reason, was almost completely blank, until one thought intruded.

Why blue violets? She and Edward had never discussed blue violets, Bella was sure. They were not even her favorite flower. What did they mean?

Bella sighed and rested her chin in her hand, narrowing her eyes at the little buds. Her mind wandered back to her first days in Forks, looking for clues – the first day in biology, the bonfire on First Beach and her shameless flirtation with Jacob, the Quileute stories about the cold ones, Googling the…

Wait. Google. Of course.

Bella almost laughed at the irony. 'When in doubt, Google it!' was apparently still her motto when it came to Edward's mysteries. She hurried over to the old computer in the corner and turned it on, tapping her fingers impatiently. Though this computer wasn't nearly as slow as the old monster from her father's house, it would still be completely impractical for people that frequently used the internet.

As soon as Firefox popped up, Bella typed "blue violets" into the search engine, but didn't see anything that looked remotely helpful. She then tried, "what do blue violets mean?" and still didn't have any luck. She sighed and thought for a moment, then rolled her eyes at how hard she was making this. "Meanings of flowers" had to work, right?

"Here we go," Bella mumbled. The first two links weren't useful at all, but the third was exactly what she was looking for.

Blue violets, according to Phillips's Florals, signified, "Watchfulness, faithfulness," or were supposed to convey to the receiver that the sender "will always be true." Bella stared at the computer screen and slowly shook her head, beginning to giggle wildly. It was a completely inappropriate response and she certainly didn't find any of it funny, but she was out of ideas as to what to do.

It was just so Edward.

An hour later, Bella pulled into her father's driveway, and before she could even get out of the car, Charlie was out of the house and unbuckling Ellie from her car seat. Bella grinned and shook her head as she shut her door, grabbing Ellie's diaper bag and bouncer from the trunk.

"Hey Bella," Charlie called over his shoulder as he began walking up the sidewalk to the front door.

"Hey dad, nice to see you, too!" Bella teased as she followed him through the front door.

Bella put all of Ellie's gear down in the living room and briefly sat on the couch.

"Her diapers, formula, the works – it's all in the diaper bag," she informed her father, who was much too busy making faces at the baby to really pay attention to her. Charlie was constantly teased these days, in a good natured manner, of course, about what a sap he turned into when his grand daughter was around. Baby talk, funny faces and silly noises seemed to be his specialty. Bella never ceased to be amazed by the changes that a baby could bring to people, herself included; certainly anything that could get that sort of response from her usually stoic father was pretty impressive.

"Alright, dad, I'm gonna go run some errands. I'll be back in a few hours or so. I might go home and try to clean before Jake comes home tomorrow night, so if I'm not back by the time you want to get rid of her, just call my cell, okay?"

"Bells, take as long as you want. Ellie and I will have a great time. Sue said she might stop by later, too." Charlie rose from the couch with Ellie in his arms and kissed Bella's forehead. "See you later, honey."

Bella smiled and gave her father a one armed hug, then leaned down blew a tiny raspberry on Ellie's tummy. "Bye bye, baby. Have fun with grandpa."

Bella waved as she made her way out the door, but Charlie was already bouncing around the living room singing a silly song to Ellie.

Bella sighed as she got into the car and pulled out of the driveway, remembering for a moment the shiny silver Volvo that had so often been parked there waiting for her in the mornings before high school. Those memories soon turned to thoughts of her old, beat up red truck, however, which led to thoughts of Jacob. He had always been and always would be her personal sun.

For selfish reasons, she wished she could bring Ellie with her on this particular "errand," but she was positive this was one thing the baby would be better left out of, even though much like her father, Ellie was turning out to be a source of constant joy and strength Bella could definitely use at the moment. Bella slowly drove through town, purposely not thinking about where she was headed until she was suddenly turning onto the still immaculately kept lane leading to the Cullen house. For some reason, she expected it to be overgrown with weeds and vines, considering it had stood empty since the Cullens left town ten years ago, but it was still as perfect as the last time she'd been there.

Bella swallowed around the lump in her throat, clutching the steering wheel tightly. She knew Edward would meet her here, had probably followed her, in fact, but part of her still couldn't believe that she was about to see him again after ten years. At first she had contemplated trying to find the meadow, sure he would be there, as well, but considering their previous history in that spot, Bella chose the next best place – and one that she wouldn't get hopelessly lost trying to find.

As the house came into view, Bella saw a tall figure standing on the porch. She looked away quickly, her breath now coming in rapid spurts, and put the car into park. Her hands were shaking and probably had been for some time, but she hadn't realized. She somehow made it out of the car without stumbling and walked slowly to the steps, staring at the ground the whole way. Bella didn't know what she expected to happen once she looked at him, but she was so nervous she thought she might throw up.

Finally, she raised her eyes to his, which she knew had been focused intently on her the whole time, and felt her breath catch in her throat. Of course, he was the same – still seventeen, topaz eyes, bronze hair, and perfect marble white skin. Even though she knew his physical appearance inside and out, it was still a shock to her system to see him so unchanged when Bella knew she didn't look anything like the eighteen year old girl he had last seen.

Her hair was shorter, lines were starting to appear on her face, and after giving birth, her figure in no way resembled the svelte teen she had once been. Her hips were wider, her breasts larger, and an unwanted twenty pounds of baby weight still lingered on her frame. While she once would have been embarrassed by her physical imperfections, however, she now found them almost insignificant. They meant things had happened to her, that she had grown and changed, and that was perfectly natural.

Had Edward changed at all?

They simply stared at each other for a full three minutes, and Bella found herself starting to relax. She could breathe normally again, and though her hands had not stopped shaking, they were shoved tightly into the pockets of her coat.

Edward broke the silence and said softly, his voice awed, "You're still beautiful."

Bella smiled tentatively and exhaled. She didn't know what to say now that they were face to face.

"Edward, I…I don't know where to begin," she mumbled.

"You're upset with me," Edward sighed. "I can tell."

Bella stopped herself from rolling her eyes and shooting back a sarcastic, "You think so?" like Jacob would; honestly, he sometimes rubbed off on her too much. Instead she simply nodded and slowly sat down on one of the porch stairs. Edward sat, too, but had the good sense to stay several feet away.

"I am upset with you," Bella began, trying to choose her words carefully. "I mean, really, Edward, what are you doing here after all this time?"

Edward looked confused for a moment, as if the answer should be obvious. "I'm looking out for you. For you, and for Ellie. She's beautiful, Bella."

"Thank you," Bella automatically replied. She got that compliment about her daughter quite often.

There was an awkward silence for a moment before Bella continued. "But Edward, I don't…_want_ you to look out for me. Or for Ellie." It almost pained her to say the words, because a small part of her knew it wasn't completely true. "I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself these days. Plus, I have a…husband," Bella finished lamely. She still felt guilty using that word in front of Edward, considering his feelings for her obviously hadn't changed much.

Edward didn't look at her, but continued gazing forward, his expression unreadable. If anyone else would have seen him, they would have sworn he was a statue, carved to sit and forever watch over the empty house behind them.

"I mean, Edward, I appreciate the fact that you want to do that for me, and especially for Ellie, but…that's what I'm for. That's what Jacob is for, to keep her safe and happy. I just don't…"

"You just don't want me around her. I know, Bella." Edward turned tortured eyes upon her and this time it was Bella that looked away. "Don't think that I haven't regretted letting you go every day since it happened."

Bella forced herself to hold back a sudden and unexpected sob and choked out, "I know it's hard for you. Sometimes it's hard for me, too. But…" she sighed and turned her face towards the sky and cold air, blinking back tears. "Edward, if I lived every day regretting it, I would be miserable." She hadn't expected to come to the heart of the matter so quickly, but Edward did have a way of getting straight to the point.

"Like you think I am," Edward said with a bitter tinge to his voice.

Bella shook her head and said slowly, "I don't know if you're miserable, Edward. I hope you aren't."

Edward didn't respond for a minute and then grudgingly admitted, "I'm not completely miserable. I'm not happy, but…I'm happy because I know you're happy." It looked like it hurt him to admit as much.

"I wouldn't change anything, Edward, especially now that I have Ellie. You told me that I would thank you one day and I _am_. Every bit of me is grateful that you were strong enough to force me to go because I couldn't have done it. I wouldn't have. But Jacob and Ellie are just…" Bella stopped, afraid she was saying too much. The problem was that she wanted to say everything to him and watch his eyes sparkle at her joy and his lips slowly curve upwards in a smile as he gazed at her.

But those images were from the past, and the point of this meeting was to firmly leave the past in the dust behind her.

Edward was gazing at her evenly, memorizing the sight of her. He said very quietly, "I can't leave you completely alone. You should know that."

Bella put her head in her hands, frustrated not only with Edward, but herself, as well. She hated that those words still thrilled her.

"Okay, look. Can we make a deal here? Some kind of compromise? Because Edward, you _can't_ keep sneaking into my house, especially into Ellie's room. I'm not…comfortable or anywhere _near _comfortable with that," Bella said firmly.

Edward slowly nodded and said thoughtfully, "I'm sorry. I should have realized, I know."

Bella forced herself, once again, to not make a sarcastic remark. Honestly, had vampires always been this dense? Were they always so oblivious to human emotions or social mores?

"I know, and I understand," Bella said patiently. "Just don't do it again."

"I won't. I'm sorry that I've upset you." Edward's voice was sorrowful.

"It's alright. Look, maybe, if you want to know how I'm doing from now on, just…maybe I can write to you? Not all the time, not even a lot, but, just to…say hi and tell you about Ellie and everything. I just can't see you again, Edward. And you can't see Ellie."

Bella abruptly stood up and brushed off her jeans, clutching the car keys in her hand.

Edward rose, as well, moving his arm as if to reach out to her, but quickly yanked it back when Bella flinched away. "I'm sorry," he said again. Bella was sure he meant for much more than just the events of the last twenty four hours.

"I'm sorry, too," she whispered. "Just…send me your address in the next few weeks, okay? And I'll save it." They stood there for a moment and looked at each other, Bella leaving most of her feelings unspoken, and then she slowly began to back away towards her car.

Walking backwards, though, was not the right decision for a clumsy individual like Bella. She suddenly felt her foot slip on a loose rock, and for a moment was sure she was going to really hurt herself when she landed. Before she could hit the ground, however, she felt icy hands gently pulling her upwards, back into a standing position. Edward's fingers slowly grazed down her arms and she shivered, whether from the cold or from the emotion his touch evoked, she couldn't tell. She was frozen to the spot, staring at his face, so close for the first time in so long.

Edward smiled slowly as he looked into her eyes, then carefully leaned down and kissed her forehead, his lips lingering against her skin. She heard him inhale deeply to fill himself with the memory of her scent.

"I love you, Bella," he said firmly.

Bella closed her eyes, and by the time she opened them, he was gone.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three: Pieces**

Bella lay silently in bed watching the clock slowly tick from one minute to the next. The house was silent, Ellie had been asleep for hours already, and Jacob was still conspicuously absent from her side.

He was supposed to be home hours earlier, but a phone call around eight o'clock told Bella that Embry's truck broke down just outside of camp. Jacob apologized a million times, but there wasn't much he could do except wait for a tow truck. Considering they were in the middle of nowhere, there was no telling how long it would take. Bella had almost cried on the phone. She just wanted him home.

Since speaking to Edward the day before, Bella had longed for her husband. Part of her felt guilty, though in her heart she knew she hadn't done anything wrong. She really just wanted the comfort that Jake always brought her.

Before the phone call, Bella planned to tell him everything that happened between her and Edward as soon as he got home. She had rehearsed her speech, along with her million apologies and reassurances, but now, four hours later, her courage was waning. Jacob would be exhausted by the time he climbed into bed, and Bella didn't want to give him another sleepless night. She would just wait until morning.

Only a few minutes later, Bella heard the garage door slowly creaking upwards and Jacob trying to silently make his way through the house. Bella expected him to appear in their bedroom doorway, but instead, his soft footsteps turned into Ellie's room.

Though she wasn't sure why she was pretending, Bella closed her eyes and concentrated on making her breathing soft and even. She didn't have the strength to deal with this at the moment, to look him in the eye and lie. After only a minute in Ellie's room, Jacob came into their bedroom. Bella heard him stop at the edge of the bed, probably checking to see if she was asleep. Apparently, her little act fooled him, because he went straight into the bathroom. The shower turned on after only a few seconds and Bella released a sigh of relief. One confrontation averted.

Bella tried as hard as she could to actually fall asleep before Jacob climbed into bed, thinking that somehow that would make her feel less guilty about tricking him before, but she didn't succeed. Instead, she figured there was no use pretending anymore, and rolled onto her other side, facing the bathroom door.

It opened five minutes later and her eyes immediately met Jacob's, then trailed down his very naked frame. Clothes had never been one of Jake's main priorities.

"Hey," she said quietly. "How was camping?"

Jake frowned. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up." He quickly snapped the bathroom light off and pulled back the covers on his side of the bed. "Camping was good. Except, you know, for the last part…breaking down, tow truck, that sort of thing."

Jake pulled Bella into his body and kissed the top of her head. "How was your weekend? You didn't miss me too much, did you?" He chuckled and Bella could feel his chest vibrate underneath her cheek.

"Haha, so funny. I did miss you, though," she said. Bella kissed his shoulder and sighed. "It was…um…"

Bella trailed off as Jake began trailing feather light kisses along her neck, sucking just below her ear.

"You were saying?" he said cheekily.

Bella smiled and tilted her head back, but immediately started to feel those annoying pangs of guilt she had conveniently pushed aside only minutes earlier. She bit her lip as her breathing began to get shorter, not from Jacob's attentions, but from a sort of panic at having to confess her whereabouts the day before.

"Jacob, wait. Stop." Bella pulled away and put her hand firmly in the middle of his chest, keeping him away from her. "I have to tell you something."

Jake stayed very still and stared at her, surprise written on his face. She could tell something about her tone alarmed him and could read the questions in his eyes.

"Okay, just…listen. I have to tell you this now because it would be horrible of me to wait and…I don't want to. And I wish it wouldn't have happened, but…"

Bella took a deep breath and stared at the wall beyond Jacob's head.

"I saw him yesterday," she said very quietly.

Jacob immediately jerked away at her words and sat up in bed. "What are you talking about, Bella?" Obvious rage bubbled just beneath his surface.

"Calm down, Jake, _please_," Bella begged. "It's not like you think. Just wait until you hear the whole thing…" She sat up and placed a tiny hand on his broad back.

"Do I even need to?" he hissed. The accusation was unspoken, but Jake's meaning was clear.

"_Yes_, you do need to, Jake. I didn't do anything wrong," Bella said firmly. It hurt to remember the times in the past that she definitely had wronged both Jacob _and_ Edward because of her own selfishness, but she had learned from her mistakes. This time she was loyal to her husband. Mostly.

Bella started speaking rapidly about waking up to find the flowers in Ellie's crib and how much it alarmed her, looking up what they meant on the computer, and deciding to confront Edward directly before he could sneak up on her again.

"Jake, I told him to stop and that he couldn't see me or Ellie anymore. I did, I _swear._ I mean, I appreciate the gesture, that he wants to protect my daughter, but that's _our _job. We're her parents and I don't want him interfering in her life or _our _life because we worked so hard…" Bella stopped and choked back tears as Jacob slowly turned to face her, an incredulous look on his face.

"Do you really mean that? You honestly told him you didn't want to see him again?"

Bella nodded and bit her lip. "Yes. I said it and I mean it. I love you, Jake. I chose you. I chose to be happy and build a life with you. I love our life."

Jacob stared at her for a moment longer and then abruptly pulled her into his arms. "You know, I think I love you, Bells."

Bella laughed quietly and tucked her head under his chin. "So you're not mad at me? Or…you know, disappointed?" Bella internally rolled her eyes at herself. Sometimes it felt like she was still a child, more from her own insecurities and shortcomings than anything else. She could only imagine Ellie coming to her with the same words in a few years after stealing a cookie from the cookie jar or something. She hated her constant need to be reassured, but it was something she couldn't seem to shake.

Jacob rubbed her back and said softly, "I am so far from mad at you. I don't even know what to think. It's kind of…shocking, I guess."

Bella frowned and pulled far enough away to see his face. "Why?'

Jacob smiled and kissed her quickly. "I guess we just need to have more faith in each other. I always wanted you to say no to him, but a part of me just thought it might never happen. I almost can't believe it." He grinned and pulled her closer again. "I feel like we should celebrate or something. Throw a party. I feel like running around screaming 'She chose me!' all over again."

Bella laughed and climbed onto his lap, pushing him back down on the bed. "Oh, we can celebrate. It's just going to be a _private_ party," she teased. Bella pulled her nightgown over her head and tossed it to the side.

Jacob raised his eyebrows and said very seriously. "Well…okay. If you insist."

Later, after they made love (twice), Bella lay comfortably in Jacob's arms. She felt a sense of peace that had been noticeably absent all weekend and was relieved to find herself once again enshrouded by it. She wasn't stupid, and she knew exactly where it came from – it was Jacob. It had always been Jacob. Even after all of her bad choices, unforgivable hurt, and beyond ordinary circumstances, he still loved her. It was a sensual and easy love, built on friendship and, somehow, mutual respect. Bella had never really seen a successful marriage in her life, considering the only people she had as an example were her own mother and father, but she felt that somehow, she had done alright anyway.

"I love you, Bells," Jacob whispered into her hair.

Bella smiled and snuggled closer to him, finally drifting off to sleep. "I love you, too, Jake." This time when she spoke those words there were no tears or pain, only perfect, blissful contentment.

The next Saturday, Bella walked quickly out to the mailbox to retrieve the mail. She left Ellie inside unattended since it was so bitterly cold, even for an early April afternoon, and hurried back in. Ellie was still bouncing happily in her little seat, reaching up for the toys on the mobile and looking at her reflection in the mirror.

Bella threw the mail down on the kitchen table and sat down to go through it. It was mostly bills for both the house and the garage Jacob owned in town, and, of course, tons of junk mail. When she got to the bottom of the pile, a plain white envelope caught her attention.

There was no stamp, just her name written in a curving, graceful hand, on the front. Obviously, he had not mailed the letter, but put it there himself after the mail came and Jacob was at work, confident that Bella would be the one to find it. Bella had conveniently left this part of her conversation with Edward, the part about her possibly writing to him, out of her explanation of events to Jacob.

Bella carefully picked up the envelope and then put it back down again quickly. She stared at it for a full five minutes, unmoving, thinking about the best course of action.

After a bit, Ellie started fussing and Bella came back to reality, looking over at her daughter. All at once, her mind was firmly made. She stood and grabbed the envelope, then began to slowly tear it in two. All at once she stopped, almost against her will, it seemed. She sighed and shook her head, then quickly ran back into her and Jacob's bedroom before she could change her mind again.

She wouldn't use it, she rationalized. She wouldn't write to him.

She just wanted to have it.

Bella opened her jewelry box on the dresser and pulled out a small key from underneath one of the tiny drawers. Though Jacob had made the trunk the key belonged to for her, he didn't know where she kept it anymore. As Ellie began to fuss a bit louder, her whimpers turning into a full fledged cry, Bella opened the closet and began digging through the junk piled on the floor until she got to the very back. The small trunk still stood there, dutifully guarding the secrets of her past, the evidence of the time spent in company of mythical creatures like vampires and werewolves.

The lock turned easily even though it hadn't been opened in years, and Bella carefully laid the still sealed, but half torn envelope inside next to trunk's other treasures – a beat up old CD, a picture album that was only half full, a charm bracelet with only two measly charms attached, and an unbelievably valuable engagement ring. She barely spared the other items a glance before closing and locking the trunk once more. It was one thing to not think about them, but another to completely throw the only things that physically linked her to Edward out of her life. If they weren't there, it was like everything between them was just a dream. Maybe it would be better that way, but for now, Bella couldn't imagine parting with a piece of her heart.

As Ellie's cries increased, Bella stood up and put the closet back to the way it was, shutting the envelope out of her mind for good. She then hurried back out to the living room and scooped Ellie up into her arms while making comforting noises.

Bella had a feeling, deep inside, that after having Ellie, she had found the final piece of her heart.


	4. Chapter 4

**Note: Thanks to those that have added the story to their favorites or to the update list. I appreciate it. :)**

**Chapter Four: A Vision**

He waited patiently for days to receive a letter and never even considered that it might not happen. It would be full of stories about Ellie – how she smiled, when she laughed, when she cried, how much she slept – and it would also be full of unspoken affection that Bella somehow found essential to try and hide from him. Edward would know it was there, though, because otherwise, she wouldn't have written the letter in the first place.

However, days turned into weeks and weeks into months and still no letter came. He became sullen and moody all over again, like the first two times they had parted, and even Alice began tiptoeing around his presence. Jasper didn't bother trying to make him feel happy – it was only a temporary balm.

Somehow, this time, their separation was worse. He had a feeling it had something to do with the fact that he knew Bella was safely at home raising a family. She had everything with Jacob that Edward wanted for himself – for him and Bella. He had never really been one to dwell on how unfair his life was, but no matter what he did, the thought kept sneaking in. Life went on without him, the rest of his family stayed as happy as they had ever been (except for the fact that they missed him), and Edward even learned how to tune out their voices.

Since he rarely left the house except to go hunting, he didn't really have to bother ignoring humans or pretending he was just like they were. He spent most of his days at the piano, playing whatever happened to drift into his head, with Esme sitting quietly on the couch, always there if he needed to talk.

But he didn't. He didn't want to talk about Bella anymore or the fact that he couldn't get over her moving on without him. He had told himself it was what he wanted all those years ago, that she would be happier (which she obviously was), and that she would eventually forget him. He thought it was what he wanted, totally and completely, with every fiber of his being. It was the selfless thing to do. Deep in his heart, he knew it was the _right_ thing to do.

It took him ten years to really regret his decision, but now it was hitting him full force. He could have had eternal happiness.

Now he just had an eternal existence.

After three and a half years, which seemed more like three days to someone who had forever to look forward to, the pain had receded to a dull ache. Edward supposed it was more tolerable that way, but it still wasn't ideal. He figured that it was just something he would have to get used to.

He had promised Bella he would stay away and not interfere with Ellie, and he was not going to break any more of his promises. Breaking a promise was what got him into this mess in the first place. At least it gave him a little bit of comfort to know that what he was doing was the best thing for Bella, and exactly what she had asked him to do. And though he didn't exactly like Jacob, he wasn't a bad guy. He was actually a really _great_ guy and Edward was sure he was just as good of a father as he was a husband. Ellie had a wonderful life, carefully guarded against all kinds of mythical monsters, himself included.

Because of all of these reasons and the resignation he had found within himself regarding his situation, Edward wasn't prepared for the knock on his bedroom door one rainy Tuesday afternoon.

He could hear her thoughts, of course, before he opened the door, but he could also tell that Alice was desperately trying to hide something from him because of her train of thought. _Wow! It's really rainy today. I wonder when Jasper wants to go hunting next. What should I get Esme for her next birthday? Rosalie better let me borrow her jacket tomorrow…_

Edward opened the door and raised his eyebrows questioningly. "Alice?"

Alice glided past him into the room without waiting for an invitation. "Hi, Edward. Do you have a minute to talk?"

Edward turned and slowly shut the door, as he suddenly caught another thought in Alice's mind. _Ellie…car…no._

Edward stared at Alice for minute, and she slowly registered that she'd been found out. "Sorry," she mumbled. "I was trying not to think about it because I didn't want you to find out like this."

She stared at him. _I had a vision a little bit ago, okay? And it's not good._

Edward sat down on the bed and stiffened, preparing himself for bad news. Alice didn't bother speaking out loud since he could hear her thoughts.

_ By the way, I…can see them now…_Alice admitted guiltily. _I started to see Bella again when Jacob stopped phasing. Now when I try really hard, I can usually see her whenever I want to_.

"Excuse me?" Edward began angrily. "You've been able to see her this whole time and you kept it from me? _How _did you keep it from me?" he asked incredulously.

Alice shrugged and sat down on the floor, her legs crossed. _It wasn't that hard. You haven't exactly been the most perceptive person in a while. And I thought it might make things worse for you._

Edward shook his head, refusing to get mad about it. She was probably right. "What did you just see? What about Ellie?"

Alice frowned and looked at the carpet, running her hand lightly over it. _I saw Bella. She was holding Ellie, but she was…she was dead. Ellie was. And there was a car. And Jacob was just standing there…in shock. It looked like it had just happened when I saw it, so…Edward, you might be able to save her if you leave now. I'm guessing it was at their house, but I've never seen the outside. It hasn't happened yet, but I think it will happen soon. I don't know if you'll make it…_

"Now that I _need_ to see them, I can't,"Alice added desperately. Her actual voice was much more anguished than the one in her head.

Edward sat unmoving on the bed. His mind, for once, was strangely blank, but he could feel a swift panic rising in his body.

All at once he jumped up, moving impossibly fast, and sprinted down the stairs and into the garage. Rosalie and Emmett stopped in the hallway as he passed and flattened themselves against the wall, twin looks of surprise on their faces. Alice was at his heels, climbing into the front seat of the Ferrari next to him and he didn't protest. If she saw anything else, it would be helpful. Edward knew it would be much faster to drive the five hours to Forks (eight for a normal human), than to try and catch a plane. There was too much waiting around when flying anyway and Edward couldn't stand the thought of doing nothing at the moment. He needed to take action.

As he had affirmed before, he was not going to break anymore promises and he had promised Ellie he would always take care of her.

He just hoped he wasn't too late.


	5. Chapter 5

**Note: thank you to my one lone reviewer so far. My, how times have changed. When this story was first posted in 2008, it was averaging between 15-20 reviews per chapter. Now I have 1 in 24 hours. Strange! Thanks to those that are reading, but I really, really welcome constructive criticism, especially on writing technique. Hope you hear from you, dear readers...**

**Chapter Five: Averted Disaster**

"Mama, no more peas." Ellie pouted, her bottom lip sticking out at an adorable angle, then pushed her plate away from her on the table. She glared back and forth between Bella and Jake, daring them to challenge her. At three and a half years old, Ellie already had a bit of an attitude.

Jake grinned and shoveled a huge bite of peas into his mouth, trying not to make a face of disgust himself. "Come on, El, peas are really good!" he coaxed.

Bella tried very hard not to laugh but couldn't help it. A small giggle escaped her lips, which then caused Ellie to glare at her even more. She didn't like people laughing at her and didn't yet understand that not _everything _in the world revolved around her.

"No laughing," Ellie mumbled. "I not funny."

Bella took a deep breath and wiped the grin off her face. She never served peas, considering both she and Jacob hated them, but she had a rule that there had to be at least one healthy food per meal, and today, she had just happened to run out of healthy things and not had time to run to the grocery store. Ellie had never had peas before, but she apparently inherited her parents' dislike.

Bella pushed her chair back from the table and picked up Ellie's plate, then leaned down and kissed the top of her head. She had eaten her chicken and mashed potatoes, so Bella supposed she would just have to be satisfied with that.

"I'm sorry, Ellie, I wasn't laughing at you. I was laughing at daddy. And you're right, peas are gross. We won't have peas anymore."

"Okay," Ellie smiled, pacified, and slid down out of her booster seat. She walked over to Jacob and began trying to climb his leg to get to his lap. Their difference in size was comical and Ellie never got tired of riding on Jake's shoulders to see a different view of the world.

Jacob stood and grabbed Ellie, swinging her up onto his shoulders.

"What do you say, El? What's next?" Jake regularly spent an hour after dinner playing with Ellie before going back to the garage to take care of paper work they were too busy to get to during the day. Embry usually took care of most of the business side of things, but he was away for a few weeks spending time with his wife and newborn son. Embry and Quil had made Jake take time off when Ellie was born, so it was only fair to return the favor.

"Outside!" Ellie tugged on Jacob's hair like reins to guide him, and pointed to the door with her free hand.

"Let me kiss mama first." Jacob walked over to Bella and leaned down, reaching up with his hands to steady Ellie on his shoulders. "Are you gonna come outside, too, Bells?" Jacob kissed both of her cheeks, her nose, and finally her lips.

"I will after I clean up a little. Have fun and be careful, okay?"

Jacob leaned down even more and Ellie planted a smacking kiss on Bella's mouth.

"Bye, mama!" She then tugged on Jake's hair again to make him stand and the two trotted out the door, Jacob making horsey noises with Ellie playfully kicking his sides to make him go faster.

Bella smiled after them and then sighed, making a face at the dishes on the table. She quickly rinsed them in the sink and began loading the dishwasher, all the while glancing out the window to watch Jake and Ellie playing catch on the driveway with a big bouncy ball. Bella had long stopped worrying about Ellie's scraped elbows and knees and didn't bother calling out a warning to not play on the concrete. Ellie, while not as clumsy as Bella, still had her fair share of mishaps. The ground was too soggy at the moment to even walk on and Bella would rather mop up a little bit of blood and kiss a booboo to make it better than have to throw away a pair of perfectly good shoes that were too caked with mud to salvage.

Bella finished loading the dishwasher and began washing her hands in the sink, laughing when Ellie threw the ball hard enough to hit Jake on the head. He dramatically fell to the ground, faking injury, and Ellie started laughing hysterically before turning and dashing down the driveway after her runaway ball.

Bella watched everything that happened next in slow motion, frozen at the sink with hot water scalding her hands. Her heart began pounding as soon as Ellie took off and Bella registered the car speeding way too fast down the street. Maybe it was a mother's instinct, but she knew what was going to happen seconds (and seconds can seem like a lifetime) before it actually did. Bella heard Jacob yelling at Ellie to stop, the horrible screech of the tires as the car swerved to try and avoid the little figure in its path, and the resulting boom as it finally careened into a tree next to their driveway. Before she even realized what she was doing, Bella was running out of the house, screaming Ellie's name, screaming Jacob's name, just screaming.

She skidded to a stop as she reached the driveway and took in the sight before her. Jacob was frozen, a look of incomprehension and shock on his face and the driver of the car had already climbed out of the wreckage, obviously unhurt, and was wide-eyed and shaking, staring at the car like he didn't know what it was.

Standing at the end of the driveway was Edward, with Ellie in his arms and a look of relief on his face. Edward and Ellie were gazing at each other, Ellie's little hands on both of Edward's shoulders. Alice stood solemnly beside him and gazed at Bella, not quite sure what to do.

Bella grabbed Jacob's arm and clung to it for dear life. She didn't feel strong enough to stand on her own. A sob escaped her lips before she could stop it and Edward finally looked towards her and away from the child in his arms. Ellie had a look of surprise on her face, not exactly scared yet, but stunned. It was impossible for her to comprehend what exactly had happened beyond the fact that it was scary and loud, but her mother did. Her mother understood.

Ellie turned at the same time as Edward, and when she saw Bella she let out a scream loud enough to wake the dead.

"Mama! Mama! Mama!" She began struggling to get out of Edward's arms and Bella's body once again reacted without input from her head at all. In seconds she was cradling Ellie, whose little body was shaking with sobs and hiccups. Bella knew her own tears were probably adding to Ellie's fear since she'd never seen her mother cry before and she worked to calm herself down. She soon felt Jacob's strong arms around her, holding both her and Ellie close to him. After a few minutes, Ellie's crying subsided and Jake slowly turned and began walking both of them back into the house.

"Wait out here," he called over his shoulder to Edward and Alice.

Fifteen minutes later, Ellie was sleeping peacefully in bed as if nothing ever happened. Bella stood with her arms wrapped around Jacob and her face buried in his chest.

They hadn't spoken a word, but Bella thought they didn't need to. She could read Jake like the back of her hand, and she knew he felt the exact same way she did at the moment, which was a whirl of emotions.

Edward had saved Ellie. Bella wasn't sure exactly why or how he came to be there when he was, or Alice, either, but it didn't matter. Ellie might have died if they weren't. That thought was too horrible to even consider.

Suddenly, Bella heard sirens in the distance and gasped, pulling away to look up at Jacob.

"Jake, we didn't even call the police! What if that man was injured?"

Jacob winced and took Bella's hand, quietly leaving Ellie's room. "He…" Jacob looked like it took some effort to say his name, but began again. "Edward probably called. And your dad probably knows, too."

Bella's eyes widened. "My dad can't see Edward or Alice! My God, Jacob, he would freak out!"

Jacob and Bella hurried outside and looked frantically around for the two vampires, but there was no trace of them. The man was sitting on the curb forlornly, looking extremely baffled.

Jake glanced at Bella and then loped over to him.

"I'm sorry we disappeared, sir, um…are you alright?"

The man looked at Jacob and shook his head. "Where are they? I saw them here. He saved that little girl…and then they were gone," he said in bewilderment.

Jacob cleared his throat and scratched his head, thinking fast. "You mean my daughter? Yeah, I…uh…I was the one that grabbed her."

The man stood slowly and stared at Jacob like he was crazy. "No. The other man…he wasn't as tall as you. And there was a girl, I think…"

Jacob gestured to Bella, who was standing just behind him. "My wife, you mean? Sir, are you sure you're alright? Maybe you hit your head and…" Jacob spread his hands in front of him, trying to gently imply that perhaps the man was a little confused from the accident.

Jacob was spared from saying anything else as an ambulance and three police cruisers, which was nearly the entire extent of the Forks Police Department, turned onto the street.

Charlie jumped out of the car practically before it stopped moving and ran over to Bella, grabbing her shoulders roughly. "What happened? Bella, are you alright? Where's Ellie?"

Bella forced a smile to try and reassure her father and then quickly hugged him. "I'm fine, dad. Everything's okay. Ellie's okay. Jacob…well, he got to her in time. He pulled her out of the way after she ran into the street after her ball and…" Bella gestured to the still very confused man standing next to Jacob. Charlie turned his attention to him.

Bella stepped back and scanned the line of trees across the street, searching for any signs of Edward or Alice. She had a feeling they were still there, watching, but she knew she would never spot them.

Jacob took her hand and squeezed it, giving her a small smile. It almost felt nice to have another sort of conspiracy going with him, a secret, just them against the world. Maybe part of Bella actually missed the excitement of her teenage years - the vampire girl versus the wolf girl. The wolf girl had decisively won out.

Jacob and Bella both gave statements to the police about what happened and avoided waking Ellie up after insisting she was okay. Being related to the chief of police had its high points, considering Ellie probably would have started babbling about the man that had saved her and blew their entire story.

As the last of the police cruisers drove away, Jacob and Bella still stood at the end of the driveway. Bella looked at Jake and said slowly, "I think they're still here, but…do you not want to see them?" Bella couldn't help it – she wanted to. She would always want to.

Jacob sighed and stood very still for a moment, studying Bella with an intense gaze.

After a few seconds, he said gently, one hand on her cheek, "I don't mind, Bella. Of course I don't mind." Jake looked toward the trees, looking very handsome and confident in the moonlight, and called quietly, "Edward? Are you still here?"


	6. Chapter 6

**Note: Thank you to the few reviewers I have gotten, as well as those that have added the story to their favorites and update list. My next endeavor, believe it or not, is a _Les Miserables_fic. Pretty different from Twilight! :) Keep your eyes open for it hopefully within the next few weeks.**

**Chapter Six: No Words**

Bella focused her attention on the trees and in a few moments, Edward stepped out into the moonlight, followed by Alice. Edward looked warily at Jacob as they neared, nervous to come closer, but Alice was back to her normal self, bouncing on the balls of her feet and smiling happily.

Edward stopped a few feet away from the pair, his eyes flickering back and forth between them. Edward suddenly cocked his head at Jacob, apparently taken aback by his thoughts.

Jacob stepped towards Edward and Bella instinctively reached for his arm to hold him back.

"Bella told you not to come here anymore," Jacob began, quite ominously, but then continued in a softer tone, "But I can't tell you how glad I am, for once, that you didn't listen."

Edward shrugged slightly. "Yes, well, I've never been very good at following orders." His voice wasn't quite cold, but it was also not friendly in the slightest.

Jacob looked almost as if his next words pained him, but he spoke sincerely. "Thank you for saving our daughter," he said sincerely.

Edward nodded briefly. Before anything else could be said, Alice obviously couldn't contain herself any longer and squealed happily. Her arms were suddenly around Bella's neck, hugging her tightly but carefully.

"Bella! Oh, Bella, look at you! You're so beautiful! And Ellie's amazing! She looks just like Jacob. She's so smart, too! And funny!"

Bella stood stiffly for a moment and then gradually hugged Alice back. She knew she was still in shock from earlier and her mind wasn't as quick as it normally was. She felt sluggish and hazy, like she was stuck in some kind of strange dream.

"Thank you," Bella finally whispered. "But…"

_ How does she know these things about Ellie? _Bella abruptly thought to herself. _She can't see me when I'm with Jacob…_

"How do you know, Alice? How did you know to be here today?" Bella, always over emotional, felt a lump of gratitude rising in her throat once more.

Alice looked guilty for a minute and avoided Edward's gaze, choosing to stroke Bella's hair soothingly instead.

"Well...it makes sense, really. I mean, we've always known I couldn't see you when you were with Jacob, but he was always the wolf, right? When he stopped phasing, I started catching glimpses of you again out of nowhere and I figured out what was happening. And now if I concentrate and try really hard, I can see you almost whenever I want."

"Oh…of course, I mean…I just didn't think that you'd ever be able to…" Bella shrugged and hugged Alice again, mumbling her thanks over and over. Despite being grateful for Alice's particular vision concerning her daughter, a strange feeling of unease settled in the pit of her stomach knowing someone could essentially spy on her whenever they wanted to…and then, of course, relay every detail to Edward, although she didn't think Alice would do that.

Alice kissed her forehead and said happily, "I like watching you and Ellie. She says the funniest things."

Jacob stared strangely at Alice, his prejudice against the vampires once more winning out over his gratefulness, and then stepped protectively over to Bella.

"So, you mean you just tune into Bella whenever you feel like it? And watch like a television?"

Alice looked at Jacob and frowned, then shook her head and said slowly, "No…I don't do it that often. Just when I want to see how she's doing."

Bella laid a hand on Jake's arm. "It's alright, Jake. I know how it works."

Even though she still felt the need to defend Alice and once would have completely believed her words, now she understood the invasion of privacy and it made her slightly uncomfortable. She didn't want her daughter exposed to this world of supernatural danger, yet no matter what she did, something inevitably happened that created another link; though without that link, Ellie might not have made it through the day alive.

Alice sighed and took a few steps back to give Jacob some more space. She could sense she should probably drop that line of conversation. The four stood there awkwardly for a moment, with Bella looking everywhere but at Edward and Jacob staring him down defiantly. Apparently his moment of gratitude was completely over and he was quickly losing patience with having vampires on his property.

"You're breaking the treaty, you know. And I know you've done it before," Jacob said suddenly.

Edward raised his eyebrows. "Yes, I know. And is there anything you can do about it now that you've stopped phasing, dog?"

Bella sighed and said firmly in the voice she usually reserved for when Ellie was misbehaving, "Okay, that's enough. I thought we were all done having discussions like this."

Jacob glowered at Edward for a minute and then turned to Bella. "I'm going inside. I'll leave you alone with them for as long as you need to say goodbye."

Jacob leaned down and kissed her roughly on the mouth with a passion Bella had almost forgotten he possessed. It secretly gave her a thrill knowing he would still fight for her, even though she knew now that there was no contest involved. With both of them standing in front of her and her daughter peacefully sleeping in the house, Bella could see it shouldn't have even been a choice she had to make in the first place.

She watched as Jacob opened the front door and then quietly closed it so Ellie wouldn't be disturbed. Bella reluctantly turned back to face both Edward and Alice, feeling for the first time like she really didn't belong with them at all.

"You didn't write," Edward said quietly.

A pang of guilt rushed through Bella and she sucked in a deep breath of cold night air.

"No…I didn't. I'm sorry." She honestly didn't feel the need to explain herself any further than that – she had told him that it was not a promise, just a possibility.

Edward stared at her intensely and shook his head.

Bella could almost physically feel a connection between them beginning to slip away and she once again panicked. What should she want? She never seemed to know exactly.

"It doesn't mean I don't care about you, Edward. It's just…" Bella trailed off, feeling frustrated. She didn't want to deal with this – she just wanted to go inside and curl up with Jacob and forget the events of the day forever.

Alice came towards her once again and patted her arm comfortingly, a wistful and sad expression gracing her pixie features.

"It's alright, Bella. We're not your life anymore. You shouldn't feel guilty about that."

Edward opened his mouth and looked as if he was about to disagree, but with a swift look from Alice, quickly closed it again. Bella felt stricken; she knew she was hurting Edward by her distance and her lack of enthusiasm at seeing him again, but there was nothing she could do. She wouldn't go with him now even if he begged her.

She looked at Alice and pleaded with her eyes for her to understand. Alice smiled and kissed her cheek, then said softly, "I think it's time for me to say goodbye."

Bella nodded and hugged her tightly. "I miss you, Alice. You have no idea how much I miss you."

"I miss you, too, but maybe we'll see each other again, Bella. Give Ellie a kiss for me, okay?" Alice stepped back to Edward's side and gave his arm a brief squeeze. "You can catch up with me, right?"

Edward nodded tensely and never took his eyes off Bella.

Alice looked worried for a moment, but continued her retreat. She waved before she hit the line of trees and then in a flash she was gone. Bella swallowed; her throat felt like it was on fire with emotion.

"Bella," Edward spoke her name quietly, almost reverently, and Bella finally met his gaze. Deep in her mind she couldn't help but think that it was astounding to know he still loved her, as changed as she was. Physically, she was now fourteen years older than him, though she looked younger than her thirty one years.

"What do you want from me, Edward?" she said desperately. "I can't…_give_ you anything else…"

Edward shook his head quickly.

"I don't want anything, Bella. I don't." He spoke firmly, but Bella could tell it was a lie. "Are you still happy?" he asked suddenly.

"I'm so happy," Bella said. "And now I'll be happy even longer thanks to you, Edward. _Thank you _for being here and saving her and..."

"It was nothing," he mumbled as he ran his hand through his hair, a very human gesture.

"It wasn't nothing. It was _everything_, Edward," Bella said sincerely. "And I need you to promise me something else."

Edward hesitated, but then acquiesced, still unable to deny her.

"Anything."

"Promise me that you'll be happy, too, Edward. Or at least try. And I promise, I swear, I promise now, that I will write to you. It won't be often, but I will. And Jake will know about it. But don't come here again if…" Bella sighed and finished slowly, "if you can help it."

Edward studied her thoughtfully and looked a bit happier at the promise of actual correspondence. "I promise, Bella."

Bella took a deep breath and forced a smile. "Okay."

They stood staring at each other for a while longer and then Bella said quietly, "You need to leave now, Edward."

He hesitated and then took a step towards her, stopping when she held up her hand in warning and shook her head. She didn't want him to touch her. She didn't know what that would bring.

Edward smiled wryly and turned without another word, walking out of her life for what Bella thought would be the final time.

She was almost surprised to find her cheeks dry as she once again entered her house – she felt unbelievably calm considering all that had happened.

Everything was perfectly quiet, Bella's soft footfalls on the carpet the only sound. As Bella entered the hallway, Jake stepped out of their bedroom, apparently waiting for her. She stopped and stared at him for a minute, suddenly feeling completely drained and overwhelmed. Seeing Edward paled in comparison to the thought that Ellie had come so close to death so very unexpectedly. A part of her supposed she now understood Edward's preoccupation with keeping her so guarded when they were together – he was terrified of a split second accident that could change everything in the time it took to blink.

Without thinking about it, Bella launched herself at Jacob, and he caught her in his arms easily. She wrapped her legs around his waist and buried her face in his shoulder.

Neither felt the need to speak. What would they even say about a day like today?

They stood in the hall, unmoving for several minutes, until a little voice interrupted.

"Mama?"

Bella raised her head and looked over Jacob's shoulder. Ellie was standing in the doorway of her room sleepily rubbing her eyes. Jake turned and gently set Bella down.

"Hi, Ellie-bear. Can't you sleep?"

Bella kneeled down in front of her daughter and kissed her forehead.

Ellie shook her head and reached out, starting to play with a strand of Bella's hair. "No. Can I sleep with you?"

Ellie looked at Jacob with her most pleading face, since he was the one that most often gave into her demands. Sleeping with her parents was usually strictly off limits as it wasn't a habit that Jacob and Bella wanted her to fall into, but tonight seemed like a good night to make an exception.

Jacob nodded and reached down to scoop Ellie into his arms.

Ellie put her hands on his face and quickly said, "Stop! Wolfy's in there!" She pointed to her bedroom.

Bella smiled and quickly retrieved the little russet colored wolf from Ellie's bed, a stuffed animal her grandpa Billy bought when she was just a few weeks old. He had given it to her with a conspiratorial wink at Jacob and much to everyone's surprise it had become Ellie's favorite thing, her security object, before she could even talk. Jacob never said so, but Bella knew it made him feel a somewhat irrational sense of pride, like his daughter somehow subconsciously knew his secret, his identity, all along.

Bella entered their bedroom and handed Ellie the wolf; she was already tucked securely under the blankets in the middle of their huge bed and Jacob had quickly changed into a loose-fitting pair of sweatpants. As he climbed into bed beside Ellie, Bella entered the bathroom to change.

She stood staring at herself in the mirror for several minutes, her mind blank. She literally couldn't form a coherent thought if she tried, but judging by the constant babble she could hear from the bedroom, her daughter didn't seem to be having the same problem. Every once in a while Jacob's voice would break through, although when Ellie got going, it was hard to shut her up. Bella finally threw on her pajamas and made it safely into bed.

Ellie was already starting to fall asleep, her voice growing fainter and fainter until it finally faded completely. Jacob laid his arm gently and protectively over both Ellie's little body and Bella.

Jake and Bella stared at each other, once again, as they both lay in bed with their daughter snug and secure in between them. They had never needed words to say what needed to be said and tonight was no exception.


End file.
